‘Saturday Night Live’ Holds Press Briefing Where Trump Declares He “Barely Knew” Epstein
Saturday Night Live‘s cold open kicked off with reporters hounding a faux Karoline Leavitt and President Donald Trump about the Epstein files. Ashley Padilla portrayed Leavitt at the White House press briefing while James Austin Johnson returned to his usual post as Trump, where the two took questions from journalists surrounding the topic, specifically in…
Saturday Night Live‘s cold open kicked off with reporters hounding a faux Karoline Leavitt and President Donald Trump about the Epstein files.
Ashley Padilla portrayed Leavitt at the White House press briefing while James Austin Johnson returned to his usual post as Trump, where the two took questions from journalists surrounding the topic, specifically in reference to new emails that were released this week.
“Okay, well I think we definitely need to start with the 20,000 Epstein emails,” Chloe Fineman said as CNN’s Kaitlan Collins. “Why does President Trump’s name appear in so many of them?”
“You know you suck, right?” Padilla’s Leavitt said. “Look, the only thing these emails prove is that President Trump did nothing wrong. If anything, his crime was loving too much.”
Johnson’s Trump later hit the stage, noting, “I am hiding almost nothing, just enough to make it extremely suspicious. But let me ask you a question: If there was something incriminating about me in the files, then why would I cover them up?”
One reporter answered, “Wait, isn’t that exactly why you would cover them up?” Johnson’s Trump continued, “Okay, let me go again. If I was innocent, wouldn’t I just release all the files?”
“Yes!” another reporter replied, as Johnson’s Trump explained that the “barely knew” Jeffrey Epstein.
“Jeffrey Epstein, I barely knew the guy, okay, as evidenced by the thousands of pictures of us together dancing and grinding our teeth at various parties, always leering and pointing at something just off camera, probably a book we’re excited to read,” he said.
“Okay, what about the specific email where Epstein said that Trump was the dog that hasn’t barked?” one journalist asked, which prompted Johnson’s Trump to respond, “Okay, first of all, I’m not a dog. I’m more of a cub or possibly an otter. Definitely not a twink. I think that’s clear, not a twink, right. Maybe twunk. You know, gays have words for everything, right?”
He continued, “Second, I thought Megyn Kelly made a terrific point this week. She said Epstein’s not a pedophile. Terrific thing to just say out of nowhere. Great job, Megyn.”
“So, you said you kicked Epstein out of Mar-a-Lago, but he said he was quote, ‘never a member,’” noted the final reporter.
“Yeah, I said I kicked Jeffrey out because he was a pedophile, but then I also said I didn’t know he did anything wrong. So it’s kind of hard to square that circle until you realize that Trump exists across many timelines,” Johnson’s Trump responded. “It’s the Trump multiverse theory. We just happen to be living in the worst possible one.”
Later, Glen Powell performed his opening monologue, where he shared a sentimental story about his ties to the late night series. He explained that he was supposed to host SNL four years ago, but the opportunity was shelved due to the COVID-19 pandemic shifting back the release of Top Gun: Maverick.
When Powell initially learned that he was supposed to appear as host, “I was on a porch with my family, and we just all lost our minds,” he said, adding that a UPS driver arrived at their home at the exact same time.
“We were jumping up and down celebrating, and a UPS driver happened to be delivering a package at that exact same moment, and he was like, ‘What is going on?’” Powell recounted. “And I was like, ‘I’m hosting SNL,’ and he was like, ‘Are you serious?’”
Powell and his family snapped a photo with the UPS driver to commemorate the moment. “But then my dream got taken away. Top Gun got delayed because of COVID, so SNL had to take their offer back,” he explained.
“So I didn’t end up hosting, which means for four years, this UPS driver was just going around saying, ‘Glenn Powell is a liar,’” Powell joked. “So now I’m here hosting. It feels amazing. But what feels even better is proving to this UPS driver that I am not crazy.”
Powell then revealed that he flew the UPS driver, whose name is Mitch, out to attend SNL to assure him he wasn’t “a liar.” He brought Mitch up on stage, and the two snapped a photo together to further celebrate his dream becoming true.
“Look, I had to wait my entire life, plus four years to be here, but if I have learned anything, it is that the best things in life don’t happen overnight,” Powell said. “And no one knows that better than UPS!”
Saturday night marked Powell’s hosting debut, though he previously made a brief cameo during Sydney Sweeney’s March 2024 SNL appearance, where she joked about rumors of a romance between the two amid their Anyone But You press tour.
The Running Man actor served as the final SNL host of November alongside musical guest (and recent Grammy nominee) Olivia Dean, following the month’s former leads in Miles Teller and Nikki Glaser. Other hosts of season 51 so far include Bad Bunny,Amy PoehlerandSabrina Carpenter.
More to come.
